


the sights and sounds of you

by rosemalings



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Demisexuality, Developing Relationship, Fluff, M/M, Minor Kang Mina/Mark Lee, New York City, Questioning Sexuality, but not in the way you think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:41:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22297243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosemalings/pseuds/rosemalings
Summary: in new york, it's easy to be anonymous because no one really seems to care. doyoung kind of likes that, actually.( yuta and doyoung like to share beds but not a lot of feelings. )
Relationships: Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Nakamoto Yuta
Comments: 2
Kudos: 51





	the sights and sounds of you

**Author's Note:**

> let this [song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-qoj0t_O74) be the soundtrack to this fic. thanks for reading!

" _doyoung-ah_ ," yuta whines at his bedroom door when a bed-rumpled johnny lets him into their place with a knowing smirk before retreating into his room again so he can get back to his game of overwatch. ( what does he know? he knows nothing. ) "doyoung, pleeeaaase."

pressing his ear against the door, he can hear doyoung grumbling and shuffling around in his room until the doorknob turns beneath his hand. yuta can't help the ear to ear grin on his face when he sees a pleasantly disheveled boy who has sadly abandoned his bed. the room behind him is otherwise dark with the projector set up to stream some nature documentary before he falls asleep. he is so cute like this. yuta feels little remorse for disturbing him from his sleepytime routine.

in an instant, doyoung is tackled into his room all over again, smothered by a boy with far too much energy for this hour, stumbling backward with a whine. but despite his wordless complaints, his arms still loop around his slender waist as yuta hugs his shoulders and peppers kisses around his face, his eyelids, his cheeks, his nose, his frown. doyoung is _especially_ cute when he whines and sulks, after all. need yuta an excuse to smother him with affection?

the younger boy sighs.

he knows that yuta is his hyung but sometimes he has to wonder who is really the older one in this friendship. relationship. thing. regardless of his irritation, he extracts himself from the octopus embrace and settles under the covers, this time lifting the corner of his comforter to welcome yuta into his personal space willingly this time around. like an eager puppy, the other boy dives in headfirst, burying his face against doyoung's chest with a quiet noise of contentment. they tangle limbs and –– doyoung is weak to his whims when yuta catches him in the right moment. today being a prime example of this.

he rolls onto his side and allows the other boy to big spoon him, even pulling yuta's arms tight around his middle, smiling when his chin nestles into the curve of his shoulder. it is instantly a mess of limbs, yuta being so wiry and squirmy against doyoung's stillness and warmth.

"is mina over again?" he asks plainly, sniggering when yuta heaves a great sigh.

"i liked it at first! little markuu getting a girlfriend we liked and could tease him about, you know?" yuta's eyes widen and he gently presses his hand against the other's middle. "did you know mark was horny? seriously, did you?" doyoung starts laughing which earns him a sharp jab of his index finger against his stomach. "don't laugh! don't laugh! i can't stand it. i think he likes when it gets loud ..."

doyoung turns his head slightly to peer back at the sulk on this boy's face. "i don't think he realizes, otherwise he'd probably be more conscientious. stop speaking to him in innuendo if you want him to be more considerate." he winces when yuta responds to reason with a nip to his ear. before doyoung can stop himself, he adds, "or do you just need a reason to come over every night?"

yuta looks vaguely offended at such an implication, narrowing his eyes at him from over his shoulder, petulant as ever. it is just one of those things that remains unspoken and ( mostly, but not really ) unseen by others. given their jobs and their lifestyles, that is how it _ought_ to be, anyway. doyoung returns to his nature viewing and yuta watches as projections of sea life follow the curve of doyoung's cheek.

"you're not even watching, bunny," yuta suddenly notices the direction of his gaze pointing away from the scenery, eyes almost closed.

"it calms me."

he hums thoughtfully and closes his eyes, listening to the sound of the narrator, the bubbling of the fish. more importantly, the sound of the younger breathing, the steady rise and fall of his chest beneath his arms. yuta smiles softly and nuzzles his face against his neck again, doyoung grunting quietly in response.

"i see what you mean," yuta concedes. 

sleep comes easily to them as the timer shuts down doyoung's equipment, both soothed by the warmth of the other boy.

* * *

doyoung wakes up to a kiss. it is tentative, half-sleepy, with hands slowly running up his sides, over his shirt, under his shirt. at some point in the night, they had shifted in bed, yuta molding himself around doyoung's slender body. it is more comfortable like this, nose to nose and toe to toe. they have developed a few routines in yuta occasionally-to-frequently dropping in and taking up all the space in doyoung's little dorm room – johnny might smirk knowingly at them in the morning over the rim of his coffee mug and hyuck might politely knock on doyoung's door, asking if either of them are able to join his overwatch game. 

what matters the most is the lazy morning kisses that yuta initiates, all tender with the barest amount of heat behind them. it's almost always touching, fingers skimming necks, chests, all that sensitive skin that remains in the dark. they don't speak, only their little sighs and grunts filling the air.

doyoung is so beautiful like this, with heavy-lidded eyes and pink lips already swollen from kissing; yuta has always thought him to be elfin, a storybook creature who somehow ended up in a music studio, especially now that the company has dyed his hair pink to suit their next projects. kissing him comes as easily to him as running through the woods, second nature at this point. doyoung kisses wholeheartedly as if you have stolen his breath, instantly flushed and panting and sometimes yuta has to lean back to watch him try to find his center all over again. at least until he swoops in, greedy for more of what the other boy is willing to give.

something is a little bit different today.

perhaps it is in the way yuta's wandering hands catch each individual curve of his ribs or the way doyoung seems to pull himself closer so that isn't a single breath between their bodies. perhaps it is in the way that yuta kisses so insistently and the way doyoung opens himself up to him, the way he whimpers when hands draw closer and closer to the waistband of his plain sleep boxers.

then they both notice it, the way doyoung begins pressing against yuta's thigh, how he freezes his movements, how red he has become, how flustered he looks. _oh_.

yuta almost teases him, all _don't you think i know what morning wood is, doie?_ but he doesn't. because that isn't simply the result of a dream, but because of the way they have been moving against each other, the way _he_ has been touching this boy. because this isn't the first time this has happened, but he gets the same reaction out of him every single time. doyoung doesn't immediately pull away but he does lower his face to avoid the way yuta looks at him, ashamed as if they haven't been gently experimenting for months now. he can feel the panic rising within him and instead of looking for a solution as he always does, he clams up.

"doyoung," he begins softly, moving his hands away from his torso and lifting one to caress his warm cheek. "doyoung, do you want –"

he shakes his head slowly, curling his hands into the front of yuta's tank instead. "just. i think that auntie has made breakfast by now," he manages to say, and yuta can't help but be grateful he at least isn't shoving him out of his bed. "and i got a toothbrush for you. it's in the bathroom."

"okay."

he doesn't kiss his forehead, doesn't insist that they finish what they started. with a little smile meant to be reassuring, he quietly slips out of the room and they both wait for doyoung's situation to disappear. 

johnny notices how quiet they both are when they all assemble around the kitchen island, not a single argument to be heard, but he at least refrains from mentioning it, instead fiddling with his french press and talking about day off plans with donghyuck.

* * *

they don't talk about the incident for some time, careful about personal space and locking certain secrets away for the future. yuta, unable to break his habits, still drops by a few times a week without the morning make-out sessions, grateful that doyoung is a little bit of a pushover and has not shoved him away yet. it doesn't change until they're in new york city again and yuta is feeling especially clingy because there is something about the brisk autumn weather and the way doyoung looks in his jacket with his brightly-colored hair.

it starts with a tentative tug of his hand once they're positioned on the thanksgiving float and ends with the two of them wrapped around each other to keep warm as they experience the surreal honor of being in a new york city parade.

"can you believe this is our life?" doyoung asks once they have passed herald square and holds tightly onto yuta's hand. the question makes him pause, the entire notion so innocent that it reminds yuta exactly how young doyoung, his sometime-keeper, really is. yuta doesn't answer him, though he does smile and ruffle his raspberry hair, playfully pinching his cheek. there they are, cheek to cheek, rolling slowly down the crowded thoroughfare in high spirits and full of laughter. 

* * *

in new york, it's easy to be anonymous.

granted, yuta has managed to convince the powers that be to allow the two of them to explore their surroundings on their own. the palace hotel is posh and overbearing at times, but mere steps away are shops and museums and he can't help but marvel at how quickly the streets have been cleaned up since the parade yesterday. with this relative anonymity, he feels emboldened.

after pressing johnny for precise instructions on how to hail a cab, doyoung wants to go to the museum of modern art where they both clutch maps in both korean and japanese, just in case the english one doesn't work out for them. he keeps losing yuta, who follows his whims and doesn't seem to care about momentarily abandoning a lost rabbit amidst the holiday crowds packing into the newly-renovated galleries. he finds yuta on one of the glass bridges overlooking the atrium of the museum, hands pressed against the glass, his eyes wide, rolled up maps sticking out of the back pocket of his jeans.

he huffs but can't help but smile as he weaves through a scattered family to get to him. his hyung looks so pretty like this, long dark hairs pulled back with a little elastic band, the shorter ends falling over his eyes, comfy in his geometric hoodie and well-loved converse sneakers, his wide eyes sparkling with mirth. perhaps yuta's courage has rubbed off on him because as soon as their eyes meet, he can't help but steal a small kiss, right there, out in the open. they both freeze and subtly look around to see if anyone has spotted two idols sharing a tiny kiss, the news that would surely set the internet on fire.

in new york, it's easy to be anonymous because no one really seems to care.

doyoung kind of likes that, actually.

they exhale and dissolve into little giggles, lacing their fingers and heading down the next corridor, towards the next set of galleries. it's easy to pretend they're other people, clutching each other's hands now that the ice has been broken, yuta pressing little kisses against doyoung's rosy cheeks, splitting treats in the museum cafe. just two foreigners having their first little new york excursion.

it feels a little bit romantic.

* * *

they return to the hotel after dinner and the spell is instantly broken when they find their american handler and offer him a little trinket from the gift shop. doyoung's heart sinks a little when they mutually and silently unlink their fingers.

"hyung?"

later that evening, once everyone has retreated to their respective hotel rooms to shower and rest before flying back to south korea for holiday performances, yuta looks up from his switch to find doyoung standing in his doorway, let in after taeyong disappeared to start a short livestream with a few other members. his eyebrows disappear into his too-long hair. "what's up?"

"can i stay with you a little?" he wrinkles his nose, though he cannot hide his telltale toothy smile. "mark is facetiming in our room."

"what did i _tell you?!_ " yuta hollers, waving him in, his game forgotten and set on his nightstand. they tangle themselves comfortably, doyoung spooning him this time as he turns on the television and mindlessly flips through the channels. yuta smells a little bit like cherries and vanilla and doyoung, lulled to contentment after their day ( date ? ) on the town, nuzzles his nose against those freshly washed locks of hair before pressing his face against his neck.

yuta beams, squeezing doyoung's skinny leg between his thighs. neither of them pay any attention to the late night talk show yuta has chosen because all doyoung can think about was their day and all yuta can think about was that kiss. uncomfortable with thing long silence, he clears his throat purposefully. "doyoung-ah, do you like me?"

he sputters. "wh – yeah. yeah! of course i like you, hyung."

"no, no, i mean, do you _like_ me." wiggling and twisting in the sheets as he often does, yuta grunts a few times as he shimmies out of doyoung's embrace, pressing his elbows into the mattress as he rolls first onto his stomach, then onto his other side so they can face each other. the younger boy is as pink as his hair now. "because i like you."

there. he said it. and he looks damn proud of himself for it, not wanting to be outshone by his friend's courage in the museum galleries that afternoon. _he's_ supposed to be the dauntless one and doyoung is supposed to be the careful one, okay?

doyoung goes through a series of expressions, stunned into silence, noises caught in his throat. his hands come up to press against his warm cheeks and he closes his eyes. "hyung, all i keep doing is pushing you away."

a record scratches in the older boy's head and he jerks his chin back. "what do you mean? what was today, then?"

"i mean," he sighs, letting yuta pull his hands away from his face. "i mean when we're together. in bed like this." he keeps his eyes squeezed shut, furrowing his brow. "whenever we get – you know. i just don't really. i don't think i'm ready for _anything_. anything yet. i mean, i like you _so much_ , yuta. why else would i want you to sleep with me almost every night? or bother me or – all of that." before he realizes it, his eyes have welled up with tears and he takes a shaky breath even as two other thumbs quickly swipe beneath his lower eyelashes. 

he has seen doyoung vulnerable before, usually when he is frustrated with a dance move or when his notes feel sour even when yuta thinks they are the sweetest sounds in the world. doyoung has seen him vulnerable, his instincts always pushing him to jump to his aid, translating a phrase, fixing his shirt buttons, bringing him ice packs when he feels especially sore. with the softest, tenderest look in his eyes, he tugs doyoung's arms around his trim waist again. "doyoung-ah, look at me. please?" he peeks one eye open, then the other, exhaling when he sees him. "that doesn't matter. none of that matters, okay? i'll kiss you and kiss you until you're ready. even if you're never ready," yuta rambles on as if filling that silence will help them out. he touches their foreheads together and gently cups the back of his head. "of course i want you, bunny, but don't ever feel pressured by me."

"i'm –" despite his reassurance, doyoung lets a few tears trickle down his cheeks, sniffing a few times. a weight has been lifted off his shoulders and he feels so lightheaded that he can't help but laugh as yuta continues wiping his face with his fingers and the sleeve of his sleep shirt. how is it possible to feel so protected yet so scared at the same time? "then. i want to be with you."

"good." he smiles and presses salty kisses all over his face. "good. because i've got you now."


End file.
